All I can say is thank you all so much for caring enough to think of me.
I've realized something in these short few days - if you don't have a good mood then you're dragging everyone down with you. And I know thats kind of hard to do when you're sorta feeling a bit depressed sometimes :/
But I figured out that I miss who I was - that little bubbly person who was bouncing everywhere and being happy.
I'm going to be her, without eating. I'm very pleased at my decision :3
That being said, I know that you're probably thinking "thats not going to work..."
BUTT i've been doing it for two days with success, and I don't plan on stopping :3 pleased=me
I shouldn't have told you anything, honestly, there wasn't a point to that. I shouldn't be telling ANYONE at all about anything I'm doing, they just worry and make me feel bad for telling them.
But it's kind of a big part of me.
Ohwell, not like we can change the past, we can only change ourselves and the future.
You don't have to listen to me anymore, because I'm just not going to talk about it ever again :)
When you see me next - i'll be skinnier >:)
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Tuesday, July 19, 2011
What Can I Say?
Yeah....I've come to a conclusion. I'm just a screw up.
I can't stick to my diets, I can't make everyone happy. I can't get off my lazy ass and run like I know I need to be doing. I miss standing up and having the black spots appear before my eyes because it's been so long since I've eaten (the last time I had that was only a week ago)...
But I'm failing to make people happy right now, and I can't stand it. I've hurt this person in the past before, and I think he's coming back around, but when I talked to him he wasn't ... exactly ... himself. Let's just say he won't remember what he was telling me last night, and he won't remember the questions I asked.
....let's just say he cares about me a bit too much
I don't think I'm going to touch the subject until I'm sure of what I'm doing with this, and even then I don't think it's adviseable to act upon anything towards him - he deserves better then me.
Just a parting word.
Lyd.
I can't stick to my diets, I can't make everyone happy. I can't get off my lazy ass and run like I know I need to be doing. I miss standing up and having the black spots appear before my eyes because it's been so long since I've eaten (the last time I had that was only a week ago)...
But I'm failing to make people happy right now, and I can't stand it. I've hurt this person in the past before, and I think he's coming back around, but when I talked to him he wasn't ... exactly ... himself. Let's just say he won't remember what he was telling me last night, and he won't remember the questions I asked.
....let's just say he cares about me a bit too much
I don't think I'm going to touch the subject until I'm sure of what I'm doing with this, and even then I don't think it's adviseable to act upon anything towards him - he deserves better then me.
Just a parting word.
Lyd.
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